24 hour

Saturday on-call was eventful up till 5am. That was when my imaginary guardian angels (... well you know what i mean) finally decided that my battered knees and sprained right wrist could need a bit of a break.

8.05am - Ashraff, the senior A & E registrar called in from the resus room, a 65y man with sudden onset breathlessness, fever and cough had a high cardiac enzyme which may signify a heart attack requiring a CCU bed.

12pm - 2 patients in CCU needed a central venous line each. "Well, no problemo gentlemen. Just show me your lower necks. I'd love to puncture those areas with my sharp 18 gauge needles."

5pm - Suraya, a super bright and vibrant 2nd year internal medicine MO called in for a CRW bed. She wanted a bed for her 60y old lady with fast atrial fibrillation secondary from thyrotoxicosis. Rate about 110/min, no failure symptoms. BP holding on with no inotropes.

10pm - another man with a heart attack had gotten worse. His type 1 respiratory failure had now complicated by severe metabolic acidosis, slowly poisoning his vitals organs and could push him into comatose state within next few hours. Respiratory fatigue will be inevitable. His BP was rather low with 3 inotropic support.

Shit. Time to intubate him.

"Uncle, you're not doing too well at the moment. We need to put you into sleep in order to make you feel better. Now before we do that, I want you to think of God in your heart and mengucap okey."

He looked weak and nodded quietly.

3am - intubated man now developed coffee ground coloured material inside his nasogastric tube.. ?? We dealing with an upper GI bleed until proven otherwise. DAMNIT. Well at least there is no malaena.

"Okey, start IV pantoprazole 80mg STAT, followed by 8mg/hour infusion. Gotta call in the bleeding team."

At that point, the patient's wife looked at me. Tears started to flow down her cheeks "What have you done to my husband, doctor... ? He was well 5 hours ago. Now he bleeds after you connected him to that breathing machine..."

I tried to comfort her "Auntie, your husband is very ill... he might be bleeding from his tummy, but it is not related to the intubation, I will..."

I couldn't finish my sentence. She already left the room with tears flowing heavily.

Second class passenger

Have you ever being made to feel that you're not good enough to join a gathering?

Although the person who was being celebrated in that gathering was a person dear to you.


You were told that somehow your presence would make other guests feel uncomfortable. And the reason for that because the other guests did not know you.



"Tranquility, no... no not now okay. Bad boy. Go play fetch. You will be summoned only when you're needed."

***

Eleanor Roosevelt once said “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”

Well Eleanor, I disagree. Not when that person meant something to me. Especially when the person who did that was the least likely person I expected to do such a thing. The person that I really care for. Otherwise, I would not give a bloody darn thing about it.

Celebration

It's Friday night!!

Tonight is something that I really look forward to. Going to put on my new shirt, apply that extra wax on my hair in my vain attempt to put good first impression among new friends.

It will start out perfectly with a wonderful dinner with some of my closest friends before headed for late drink with a bunch of new friends in celebrating someone dear to me.

The very fact that she also would like to share this special night with me means that I'm also a close friend in her life.

It will be an absolutely brilliant night.

Civilised

The world is filled with 6.5 billions lives, each with its own unique personality. Every each and one of them has amazing stories which we could tap into and take away from them valuable lessons in life.

To respect others is important, no matter how much you might 'potentially dislike' them due to very personal reasons. But in the end, I realised that if you put those reasons aside and try to see that person in a neutral perspective. I have a feeling that you will find something in common which you would respect.

Well tonight I got the chance to meet up with someone who fit that bill and we behaved like a bunch of civilised men.

It's been a productive day.

Blue

Sunday. 7am.

I sat down in the balcony overseeing an empty pool. The sky was breaking blue on the horizon.

The soft January breeze from the south unabashedly caressed my face.

Moments passed as I sat there gazing upward to what appeared to be a heaven on earth.

Then only did I realise how lucky I was that I had been held captive by a beautiful day.

This is the life.

Resolution

It was a calm, quiet night.

Not a touch of chaos in sight.

The full moon bathed us in its light bringing everything else into a sense of perfect balance.

As the midnight hour struck, we raised our drinks and toasted to a good year and good health.

At first, I thought being a happier person with what I already have would be my new year's resolution.

Damn, I was wrong. This life is not just about me.

It's about making a difference in other people's lives.

..."Life is short I'm going to help as many lives as I can".